Okay, as promised here are my picks for Evil Editor’s “match the synopsis to the title” contest.
This was hard! I’ll be very surprised if anyone gets even half of them right. At first I was picking the ones that seemed kind of straight, but that can’t be a good strategy, considering how goofy people get when they try to invent what they think will be a saleable novel premise. So I switched my choices on a couple, looking for synopses that have a particularly naive “out there” feel to them.
But of course, the Evil Minions submitting fake synopses were presumably trying to create examples that had that feel . . . so who knows?
Like I said — this was hard!
(And John, I promise I’ll publish which five I contributed as soon as the contest is over! I can’t do it now, tho! lol)
Q1. Spitting Image
13. After a night of drunken stupor, Hal finds himself married to a girl who is identical to a ghostly figure from his childhood dreams.
Q2. Bad Ice
8. Stan Milburn, heist-man extraordinaire, gets more than he bargains for after he steals the cursed black diamonds of Calcutta.
Q3. The Heart of the Tengeri
6. Clarissa trusted rugged jungle guide Will to lead her through the Tengeri rainforest. Will her trust in the gentle stranger lead to danger? Or romance?
Q4. Little Girl Blue
2. When rookie cop Sarah Baxter is sent on her first undercover mission, she must catch the killer quickly… or miss her thirteenth birthday party.
Q5. The Whog Manual.
6. Space Pirate Verna’s newly-stolen starship is a special prototype about to plunge the reluctant thief into an adventure he never expected.
Q6. Commandment
3. Doctor Death, the self-proclaimed lord of crime, finally meets his nemesis: The Deity. Will Death bow to The Deity’s commandment — “Thou shalt not kill!”?
Q7. Life, Love, and a Polar Bear Tattoo
10. Pam moved to California envisioning the high life and true love. Dreams don’t always come true, Pam learns, as she struggles to pay for bread.
Q8. Raise the Buried Dead
3. Nobody ever said voodoo was easy. But when Vance raises a trio of zombies, he finds that undead underlings are more trouble than they’re worth.
Q9. When Sid was Sid
1. Chapters alternate between past and present, as Margaret Divan describes life before and after she discovered her husband Sid, is a transsexual.
Q10. Dressed to Kill
10. A nightclub owner’s plan to have themed costume parties to attract business seems to be working — until she realizes the vampire “costumes” aren’t actually disguises.
Q11. Second Growth
12. A forest fire takes Mary’s family, and her sight. The power of nature can restore the woodlands, but can it give her back her happiness?
Q12. The Midnight Diaries
3. Two kids venture out every midnight to solve crime and help their mom get elected mayor, aided by GPS technology.
Q13. The Innocence of Evil
12. Only Macy Sanders knows that inmate Trey Mitchell doesn’t deserve lethal injection. He’s innocent. But Macy’s fiance knows nothing of Trey. Or of Macy’s past.
Q14. Heart of Desire
3. Vascular surgeon NICK loves JESSICA, but her ailing ticker may “do the newlyweds part.” Nick’s first wife once promised him her heart; is she Jessica’s genetic match?
Q15 Lack of Control
3. An alpha male CIA agent must battle his inner demons and protect a vital microchip from a beautiful and mysterious spy, or millions will die.
Q16. The Island and the Bell
6. Following a plane crash at sea, lone survivor Bob has only a silent bell, found in the wreckage of the plane, to keep him company.
Q17. Bad to the Bone
6. Custom motorcycle builder Danny Irons must prove he didn’t kill the man whose oil-soaked skeleton turns up buried behind his shop.
Q18. Portal to Murder
4. A detective and his attractive partner discover a string of murders caused by a mysterious portal that transports your soul to hell. Even if you’ve been good.
Q19. The Monster Within
7. Anna’s lycanthropy is under control–until she meets Jerome, who inspires all her best instincts and excites all her worst.
Q20. Soulscape
3. Danni knows she’s special. But now she’s involved with a treacherous voodoo priest, and must prove it–on the Soulscape, the realm of the dead.
UPDATE: I didn’t win :D
