Kirsten Mortensen's blog

Yeah, I know it makes no sense. But look at it. So big and . . . bricky. Those gorgeous windows, can you imagine how they frame the view when you’re inside looking out?

And right there on main street. Nothing would go down without my knowing about it. Nothing!

Technorati Tags: old brick building somewhere in Upstate New York

The Gingham dog and the calico cat
Side by side on the table sat;
‘Twas half-past twelve, and (what do you think!)
Nor one nor t’other had slept a wink!
The old Dutch clock and the Chinese plate
Appeared to know as sure as fate
There was going to be a terrible spat.
(I wasn’t there; I simply state
What was told to me by the Chinese plate!)

The gingham dog went “bow-wow-wow!”
And the calico cat replied “mee-ow!”
The air was littered, an hour or so,
With bits of gingham and calico,
While the old Dutch clock in the chimney-place
Up with its hands before its face,
For it always dreaded a family row!
(Never mind: I’m only telling you
What the old Dutch clock declares is true!)

The Chinese plate looked very blue,
And wailed, “Oh, dear! what shall we do!”
But the gingham dog and the calico cat
Wallowed this way and tumbled that,
Employing every tooth and claw
In the awfullest way you ever saw—
And, oh! how the gingham and calico flew!
(Don’t fancy I exaggerate—
I got my news from the Chinese plate!)

Next morning where the two had sat
They found no trace of dog or cat;
And some folks think unto this day
That burglars stole that pair away!
But the truth about the cat and pup
Is this: they ate each other up!
Now what do you really think of that!
(The old Dutch clock it told me so,
And that is how I came to know.)

Heh heh. That was easy!

*With apologies to Eugene Field

Technorati Tags: Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama

One of Elliot Spitzer’s last acts as Governor of our state was to propose we tax illegal drugs — as a way to address our budget issues.

Hey, I wonder why he didn’t propose we tax prostitution as well?!?!?

Think of the extra bucks we could bring in!

And while we’re at it, Spitzer thought it would be a fine idea to force NY State residents to pay sales tax on business we do with out-of-state merchants.

The sales tax rate in Albany is 8 percent.

According to some accounts today, he’s spent $80,000 on prostitutes over the last decade.

Back of the envelope calculations: he owes $6400 in sales taxes!!!!

Plus penalties and interest, thank you very much!

Technorati Tags: Elliot Spitzer, New York State Taxes